PraisesOnMyTongue's Xanga

The Power of Prayer...

Thu, 21 Jun 2007 18:57:27 GMT

Sorry that I've been neglecting Xanga! I got a Myspace (romans8_38) and I hate it but I've become addicted to it, nonetheless!!

I will get to the amazing part in a sec., but first: Emma, her mom, and I went shopping today for skirts and dresses for Nicaragua since we can't wear pants there. We got quite a bit of stuff! Yea! =D

Are you ready for this?!!! It will blow your mind!
Last night I went to an intense prayer night with my youth group at church. It was only for those who were really interested- there were about fifteen of us there. This lady, Pam Hood, whom I've never met before in my life, but is one of the guys' mom's in our group, was the speaker. She and I introduced ourselves to each other before she gave the message. She was talking about the power of prayer and her son gave a little testimony of prayer in his life as well.
Mind-Blowing Part Numero Uno: Zach, the son, said that when he was in seventh grade, he had a really bad knee injury from playing basketball- his growth plates separated from each other so he had to limp and hobble around. He went to this Christian youth conference and they were all in prayer. The guy on stage was randomly calling out for God to heal people in the audience. Zach quietly prayed to himself, "Lord, I know that I don't have cancer, and my knee injury isn't a life or death thing, but I also know that you take interest in the small stuff. Could you please tell that man on stage to say something about You healing someone's knees, and then I'll know that You did it." AS SOON as he finished that last part of his prayer, Zach said that the man on stage stopped for a second and said, "There's someone here who's knees need to be healed; Lord, heal them!" And then all of a sudden, Zach said that he COULD FEEL HIS GROWTH PLATES SLIDING BACK TOGETHER and he went back to the doctor, and the doctor said that he was fine!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Isn't that absolutely AMAZING?!!!
Anyway, so that totally blew my mind when he told us that, so I thought I'd share that with you. Now for MY amazing experience.
Mind-Blowing Part Numero Dos: So Pam started praying and after about five minutes she stopped, so everyone looked up, including me. She turned and looked directly at me and said while pointing to me, "Caitie, God has put you on my heart right now... you have compassion for someone or something. God says that you have compassion and I should pray for you!" I was like: ::jaw drops then nods head::. What do you say to that?! So she rushed over to me (and some other people did to) and they stood in a circle around me, putting their hands on me and praying for me- about something that they had no idea about!! I started tearing up because it was just so amazing!!! They got done and she looked at me and asked if there's something that really is sticking out to me about compassion, and I told her about how I really have a heart for witnessing to those in Hollywood- the celebs, and many people have been discouraging me, even though I have this burning desire to go there and reach out to them. -That's the only thing I could think about when they were praying for me!!! I hadn't told ANYONE about that at church before because this burning desire has only just come up recently! Now I know that this is from God and that this is His will for me!!!!! I'm going to Hollywood, guys! I have no idea how or when, but God will make a way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This experience was just so amazing because this lady doesn't even know me and she was so intense!! IT WAS AWESOME!!!!!!!
Mind-blowing Part Numero Tres: We must've prayed an hour and a half straight through- the time flew though. About four or five people prayed for a girl in the group because her name came to their hearts and another guy said that the word "relationships" was coming to his mind for this girl. Right when he said that, she started crying. It was so from God!!!! A few instances happened like that. Another thing that was awesome: A guy for some reason prayed for Satan to just leave us and flee from us because we are so strong in Christ. There was power from God in his voice. Right when he said "Satan, flee," I felt this weight- this force I cannot describe repel off of me and I started shaking! Lately I've felt disconnected from God, but when he said "Satan, flee," Satan came out/off of me and now I feel so connected with God, it's amazing. I felt so free after he said that and I couldn't stop shaking. AHHH, GOD IS SOOOOO COOOOOLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

God bless!!!!
Love from your sister in Christ.
Today I thank God for: being able to have a close relationship with Him through PRAYER!

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Wed, 06 Jun 2007 18:18:25 GMT

One day of finals done... two more to go!

Kyle, my church youth group leader, just called me and asked me two things:

1. If I wanted to be one of the teen spiritual leaders on the mission trip in Nicaragua!! This means that I would meet with a few others who have been chosen regularly before and during the mission trip for prayer and encouragement. I would be paired up with one of these people and he/she and I would be directing our groups and leading them spiritually.
2. If I would be interested in speaking at one of the Over the Edge church services (for teens) sometime over the summer!

This is so awesome! I feel like God is calling me to be an evangelist like Billy Graham when I'm older and He's giving me all these speaking and leadership opportunities (just a few weeks ago I spoke in front of over fifty teens at a church unity outreach in Viking Park)... one after the other! God is so cool. =D

God bless.
Love from your sister in Christ.
Today I thank God for: His forgiveness and unconditional love.

I <3 My Accountability Partner...

Mon, 04 Jun 2007 21:24:28 GMT

She is such a blessing from God (Susan, isn't it so awesome how we met at the mission trip in Hattiesburg- we met at a time when EVERYTHING was about God and for God?! He is truly at the core of our friendship!!!!) and sent me an email that was completely in perfect timing as well as perfectly worded with a perfect verse for the occasion!

"Do not stir up or awaken love until it so desires."
-Song of Songs 3:5b

"Love must be allowed to grow naturally, in its own time. It is not to be forced or given an artificial stimulus."

I'm much more at ease because of her awesome email. Thank you!
God bless.
Love from your sister in Christ.
Today I thank God for: good friends and my wonderful friend and accountability partner, Susan.

Stressed OUT!

Thu, 31 May 2007 22:53:03 GMT

I cannot wait until school's over!

About yesterday's entry: I won't act on anything until the Lord gives me a sign... yet I'm still worried. I've been getting mixed responses about what I should do from my friends (and my mom) and I found out more info today which just added to the confusion. I don't know what I want, anymore. I feel like I need to be put in a straight-jacket so I don't act on my own human nature (and possibly because I'm going completely insane over this!) My mom has one very narrow opinion: run awwaaayyy(!), the majority of my friends say that I should act, one friend who understands the situation the best says she has no clue what to do- it's a double-edged sword. Can you see how I'd be torn?? Lord, what is Your will?

God bless.
Love from your sister in Christ.
Today I thank God for: SWAP... today was our last meeting for the year. I also thank God for Jesús, who shared his powerful testimony today.

"You're like Gandhi... small but powerful!"
-Mr. Maione to me in my yearbook.

"Lean not on your own understandings..."

Wed, 30 May 2007 23:44:02 GMT

My head is spinning and I am so confused. I am beginning to think that my sister's got the right idea by going to an all girl's college. I am so tired of all of this guy-girl flirting confusion and just ugh! I am so tired of high school, but I've got three years left!!! ... Anyone wanna got a paper bag for me to put over my head so I can hide from all guys everywhere? Someone help me... I don't want to date!!

Things that I thought I was over are coming back and I am so confused. Confusion is from Satan and I can tell that he's on the attack again. All of this reminds me of the verse that my grandma had written on my cast in eighth grade:

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understandings; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.
-Proverbs 3:5-6

I memorized those two verses and it's times like these that I need to be meditating on them. It seems so simple: trust in God and not in yourself and you'll be fine, so why is that so hard to do?

God bless.
Love from your sister in Christ.
Today I thank God for: His Word.

"The Church was and is something that the world has never seen before."

Sun, 27 May 2007 20:58:18 GMT

I did something spontaneous yesterday...

... you'll just have to wait until Tuesday to see!

Pastor Chris' sermon was really good today. He talked about rebuilding our church spiritually and, in our hearts, making it open to everyone- not just the people who'd fit in. "The Church was and is something that the world has never seen before." "... A new hope... the hope of the world." During his benediction, he told us to imagine someone that we would never think of seeing at church worshipping with us- standing right next to us as we sing. I had tears in my eyes when I pictured the person God had put on my heart. Just thinking of that image... of that person worshipping Christ with me... is amazing- just another one of God's blessings that I could not describe. Just that little vision encouraged me tremendously. Lately I've been discouraged because I want to do so much for Christ, but many times the results don't come through until years later... so I've been lacking in evangelism a lot. But because of this moment, I've gotten an extra push from the Holy Spirit and I now feel "re-energized". It's in God's hands. Anything is possible with Christ.

God bless.
Love from your sister in Christ.
Today I thank God for: the creation He made sixteen years ago, today. =D

Really Hard to Talk About...

Wed, 23 May 2007 01:33:28 GMT

It's been a rough two weeks at home and my emotions are a rollercoaster right now. Makeup has been my friend, lately... it's been covering up the traces of my tears.

Denial

Sadness

Pain

Temptation

Anger

"Don't let go of me, Daddy; please don't let go..."

I feel like I don't belong anywhere right now... not with my dad and not in my own house. It reminds me of the song by MercyMe: "Homesick". My true home is in Heaven, and that's what I need to be focusing on, but it's so hard to.

"All [you] can see is the storm, but as [your] [D]ad, I'd do anything to get [you] out." -Rob Bell

There's so much more than this.. something that I may be denying and it's really scaring me (sorry if this is difficult to understand), and I just ask for your prayers, please.

God bless.
Love from your sister in Christ.
Today I thank God for: Vicky Garcia.

Outreach and $20,000...

Sun, 20 May 2007 20:04:22 GMT

The outreach at Viking Park was awesome!! The worship was AMAZING, I wasn't nervous one bit when I spoke, and God blessed us with a goregous day to host this event on!! He is GOOD!

Saturday I got a letter from the Schuler foundation, and I am now officially a Schuler Scholar! Yaahhhoooo!!! The scholarship gives me a total of $20,000 for any college, and I will be involved in programs, free field trips and college visits, etc. for the rest of high school. =D

God bless.
Love from your sister in Christ.
Today I thank God for: Gurnee church unity.

Drugged-Up Donut...

Fri, 18 May 2007 21:43:01 GMT

I went to Citgo with April after school today just to get a quick snack, so I bought a yummy-looking donut. I came home, bit into it, and immediately spit it out. It tasted like the smell of pot!!! I had Monte try it, and he said that it tasted like pot. So we put the donut in a bag and will probably be taking it to the police. Ahhh, my town is just so interesting, isn't it?

God bless.
Love from your sister in Christ.
Today I thank God for: giving me rest.
*Pray for me for my speech tomorrow!!*

Just When I Thought Things were Going Well...

Thu, 17 May 2007 00:52:51 GMT

1. Bomb threat again, today. We were evacuated to the field and stood there for over an hour.
2. Car crash right outside of my Literature class... during classtime.
3. Concert last night... awesome, except my dad didn't show up. I came home from my Schuler Scholarship interview today and played the messages. My dad had left a horrible message saying how he called in sick and came to the high school today because he thought the concert was tonight (we had left him messages and told him a month in advance, however). He then proceeded to yell and scream at us, saying how he won't be involved with us if we don't give him dates er something along those lines. My sister started bawling while I just sat there, completely in shock and numb to it all. She then called him and gave him a mouthful. "How dare you say that to me!! I am so tired of this... I want... need you to be involved in my life, but if it is such a burden for you, then don't be!! I just can't take this anymore!!" and on, and on. I am so proud of her- she's never done that before and it's been a long time coming. However, he just blew it all off and went on to a new subject. Mom says I should talk to him because I'm so... there's not even a word for it... right now. I talked to him the night before the divorce- just as Allie did tonight. I poured out my heart and soul (and not to mention my tears) to him, and he denied it all and blew me off. I can't take that, and that's what's keeping me from talking to him again. I can't take being ignored. It hurts too much.
Every time I think I can trust him again and I get my hopes up high... really high- he let's the ball drop and I fall even harder and it hurts so much more because I thought things were going well between us. I am so tired of this. Will he ever become the dad I need him to be? Can't he at least pretend that he cares?
Lord, what do you want me to learn from this?! Can't you take all this pain away? What are you trying to get me to understand?!